The Last Girl on Earth
by K4r3z43vs
Summary: DirkxRoxy oneshot with lemony tendencies...


The house was empty again. The only bit of light that could be found spread from a small room on the top floor, the only sounds that could be heard were the odd mouse click and the tapping of keys. Normal sounds on a average evening, but he could've sworn, on nights like this he could almost hear the crash of waves just outside his window. Even years later, in a landlocked home, in a world filled with millions of people, nothing could keep the echoes of the ocean out of his head. Nothing could make him forget what it felt like to be completely and totally alone.

Looking at the screen was giving him a headache.

Absently, he pulled up some bland-as-fuck social networking site, the kind of place that people used to post picture of their dogs and houses and exchange invites to underwater basket weaving parties or whatever it was that they were into these days. It would have been an understatement to say that Dirk did not even begin to give a fuck.

There was one and only one reason for the bullshit account that he'd made for himself.  
He didn't have to look at his miniscule friend list for very long to find the person he was looking for, this feeling was making him sentimental. As soon the page loaded he wished that it hadn't.

"Janie and I have finally started on our grand adventure into the Swiss Alps! We got one of the locals to take this picture of us next to this breathtaking view of the wildflowers! Behind us is Mt. Flooglehorn we scale it on the morrow!"

The words served as a caption to picture a of two faces that Dirk could never forget, Jake had his arm wrapped around her waist as she rested a cheek on his khaki utility vest. They both looked ready and exited to scale the dusty white mountain that lay behind them.

He had to close the window. That wasn't something that he needed to look at, too much jealously tangled up in feelings that didn't need to be corrupted by it. His best friends were safe and happy and doing exactly what they had probably always dreamed about their whole lives. It was the sort of life that he had heard everyone deserved, the kind of life that people were supposed to want. Find your one true love, get married, travel the world, he was sure any day now he would be getting some overly enthusiastic call about the birth of the next member of the English family. It seemed like everyone was falling into line like that these days...

Now the screen really was giving him a headache. He clicked off the monitor and stretched his arms over his head trying to release some of the tension in his shoulders. He really needed to get Shades back, or at least build some kind of replica that he could use to do daily computer shit because looking at a physical screen through triangles of tinted glass attached to your face was no way to live...

He took off his regular shades and ran a hand through his hair, he glanced at the clock. 3:38 am Jeez, it was getting late even for her. He sat there for a few long minutes spacing out, trying not to think of anything. There were so many things that he just didn't want to deal with, and nothing at his disposal now could have served as an adequate distraction.

The colossal clatter of broken glass announced the arrival of Dirk's longtime roommate. Dirk had to wonder how she had even managed to get home in that state. He really wished that she wouldn't go out alone to drink like that, actually he wished that she wouldn't drink at all.

"Im toes all right! It wuz just a vas!" (*totes *was *vase)

He got up from his desk chair and gave a sigh that looked like exasperation, but that cacophony of destruction downstairs was what he had been waiting on all night. These days, she was the only thing he ever had to look forward to. He got up from his desk, not bothering to put his shades back on before he went.  
She was collapsed just a few feet shy of the stairs, it looked like she had remembered to take her shoes off this time, though she was still wearing a fur trimmed overcoat. At the sound of footsteps she twitched back to life, lifting her head, groggy fuchsia eyes tracking what Dirk judged to he his kneecaps.

"Hey Dirkie! I omsohpaitseeyou..." she mummbled some variation of his name followed by incomprehensible babble.

"Hey Rox," He knelt down to her level and put a hand on her head,"What you up to down there?" He couldn't help smirking slightly, he asked questions like this to gauge how far gone she was, though the answers he got were pretty usually hilarious.

"im bein really djrnk..." (*being *drunk) she said, pressing her cheek to the tile floor and closing her eyes. "you wldn understab" (*wouldn't *understand)

"Oh really?." Dirk tried not to laugh out loud. Instead he stopped to consider how he was was going to get her from here to her room. She would be better off in the morning if he got her to drink some water, so he had to do that, but first things first was getting her out of that overcoat. "Well I you forgot to take off your coat.

"It wash too stupid." (*was)

"Alright, let me help you then." her coat wasn't really buttoned so it came off easily when he tugged on the sleeves. She was wearing some kind of purple sequinned mini dress. Probably too flashy for someone technically her age. Though there wasn't anything about her appearance to let on to that. Subrb had at least given them that much.

Dirk stashed the coat in it's rightful place by the door, glacing over his should to make sure nothing happened while his back was turned. What damage could one drunk girl do? Not much, one might think. But Dirk had spent enough time tackling her unconscious shenanigans to know that the answer to that question was "A metric crapton." if said drunk girl happened to be Roxy Lalonde.

But tonight she remained motionless. Her arms splayed out from the way he'd taken off her coat. Her face and shoulders had stuck to the tile, leaving the rest of her body laying in a strange position. Legs spread and bent at the knee, lifting her lower body higher than her head. The edge of her short dress had slipped down the incline of her back, leaving her legs, thighs and backside exposed. Idiot. His first gut instinct was to look way, though he'd had the experience of seeing his ever-modest roommate wandering around in even less on a near daily basis, but it felt sort of wrong when she was drunk out of her mind like this.  
But he couldn't just stand there and look away while she froze to death in the entryway. When he turned back he tried to tell himself that it was just the eye-catching pattern on her underwear that made it hard to look away. But it all honesty, it was the simple fact that Roxy had the most insanely perfect ass that he had seen this side of the double X chromosome. It was just the facts and it would have been wrong to deny it.

He crossed the room and gently extricated Roxy from her compromising position, trying very hard to think of the physical contact matter-o-factly. I wasn't supposed to be his thing, though there was something primitive that never let the part of him that saw it as something more go away. Despite the one, soul-crushing romance that Dirk had peruse throughout his life, there was always that part of him that wondered. Maybe there was something he had been missing all this time.

As he helped her turn over she mummbled thanks, making some attempt at conciousness as she flailed onto her side. She looked up at him from from the floor, her bright colored eyes standing out almost too well on her pasty, drunken face. As eye contact was reached her smile grew lopsided.

"You were to totaly chekin mi butt again weren't you" (*tatally *totes pshuu watever)

"That cannot be confirmed or denied." Dirk smirked down at her, though as a bit of color involuntarily came to his cheeks he wished that he hadn't left his shades upstairs. "Can you stand?"

"hmmprbly. misterbuttgazer..."

"Alright, lets try that then." he chose to ignore her her stab at his preference in body parts, hopefully she wouldn't remember this tomorrow. He steadied her waist in his right hand as he tried to steer her to an upright position. He tried not to think about how easily he could have let his hand fall and just a few inches lower, and taken a moment to get acquainted with the hand-feel of certain regions. Just something small to remeber the moment by, but still he once again managed to hold back.

"pfft..." Roxy stood shakily for just a few moments before giggling and falling into his chest with all her weight. The sudden warmth of another body in his arms took him by surprise and cracked a bit of the control that he was still struggling to manage. "I leid," (*lied) she whispered in his ear and pressed even closer, he could feel every nuance of her anatomy as her warm, vodka scented breath tickled the nape of his neck. "warking is prbly gnna be really hard..." (*walking *gonna)

"It seems so..." He had to laugh a bit bitterly at her ever perfect selection of word choice. Roxy could always be counted on for things like this, though it was difficult to tell if she knew what she was doing. She giggled again as he effortlessly picked her up beggining with slightly labored steps up the stairs, reminding himself that all this was just an annoying castoff of biology.

Dirk had no trouble navigating the mess of wizard figurines and empty bottles that was Roxy's room. It was like the fith or sixth time after all. Or maybe it was eighth or tenth, who really knew? But this wasn't the first time he'd helped a drunken Roxy get to sleep.

"wow ur so fast..." she mumbled as he set her down, looking around with drooped eyelids, "i'm all the way in my room alrey." (*already) The warmth in her smile sent a whole knew surge of shivers down his spine. "Thanks Dirk... youer the best"

"It's not that big of deal." He glanced over at the bedside table where a large pitcher of water sat with a glass, he though that he'd put it there last time but it looked like it had remained untouched. He poured a tall glass, "but you should drink this, or you'll be on a one way bullet train to extreme hangover city."

"Nah, um good. already had too much stuff silly..." she said turning away.

"It's just water," he gently lifted the back of her head and pressed the glass to her lips, "Drink it."

"Hehe," something seemed to cross her mind and she grinned at him lasciviously, "Olny if you watn me to, babe." (*Only *want)

"Yes, I do want you to drink it, stop trying to be sexy and do so." he tilted the glass and watched as she downed it gulp by gulp. She kept looking at him, little rivulets of water running down the sides of her chin. When the glass had been emptied she smiled at him.

He went to wipe the droplets, just a light touch on either side of her slightly open lips. But he was too slow to get away. Suddenly her hand was there, a strong grip for someone who couldn't even walk. She was nuzzling into his palm, bringing his forefinger close to her mouth, perfectly white teeth softly bit down on his knuckle. The blood rushed out of head and he was momentarily unable to do anything but give into the feeling. At one small moment all he wanted to do was rip off that stupid dress and take advantage of her in every way possible. He didn't care how either of them would feel in the morning. It was completely wrong.

"JESUS CHRIST ROXY! Stop! JUST STOP!" He ripped his hand away and stood up. "Why the hell, in world with nearly seven billion people that you could theoretically fuck, do you keep trying to seduce me!?" It wasn't right, for someone who could do way better, she was always there, being a liability, someone to hurt and be hurt by. And we was always the dumbass who allowed, it encouraged it, played with her feelings when she wasn't even aware. All in the name of his own complex boundaries. She was without a doubt the most important person in his life, but there was no way he could stand to ruin that platonic affection, with something less savory. It was a complicated feeling that never served to do anything but piss him off.

"It's-"

He turned around, the pit of his stomach going cold at the pure dejection in her voice. This wasn't what he wanted, she was crying again. He stood there frozen as her mouth worked, trying to find the words.

"B-because you're the only one that can understand..." She didn't try to hide her tears, the booze making the decision for her, the expression on her face was as raw as a bleeding wound. "You're just... the only one that knows what it's like... I-im sorry I'm sorry..." she dissolved, repeating the same phrase , "I'm sorry" she was pulling her knees to her chest, withdrawing into her own world.

Dirk was sorry too, more than sorry, broken, It would have been best if he just disappeared altogether, but he was still standing there, once again watching the results of his own failures. He had wanted everyone to be happy, but here was the last girl on earth, lost and trying to sink herself into a cowards grave.  
He was kneeling down, laying beside her, warping his arms around her shaking body. He wanted to say something to console her. She was beautiful, perfect, not the one who deserved to carry these scars. She should be standing in some European meadow on the arm of the perfect man, her only care in the world being what mundanely pleasant thing she would do next.

The minutes stretched on as they lay there, two haves of a broken being. Her tremors began to fade and silence returned.

"Dirk." her voice sounded somehow small as she spoke into his chest, "Please don't go."

"I can't Roxy, you know that I can't."

"Tell me, for once" she moved slightly turning to look up into his eyes, her face was still stained with tears, "that you don't want to."

"I-"He couldn't say it, who wouldn't want to leave this entire fucked up place. It only existed as the direct result of their hard work, their sacrifices, but only a small few could remember and even they were wrapped up in their own worlds. Playing the tapes that they grew up with, not suddenly flung into a foreign world of the distant past.

But there was her. Even when he didn't ask, she was always there to distract him. Open bottle, open heart, open legs and for that he owed her his life. There was some aspect of that devotion that kept him going, that gave him a reason to stay around.

Words felt useless in communicating his ideals, he found himself taking her tear-stained cheeks in hand. Her lips were supple and tasted of salt and booze as he kissed them, lightly at first, waiting for her to notice, he felt her breath rush in and then she was responding in kind, passionate and just a bit sloppy. It was like medicine, erasing all thought, sating urges that he didn't know he had. He let his tongue slide deeper into her mouth, enjoying the bitter flavor.  
Without disconnecting he pulled her up on his chest, feeling the comfortable weight of her body pressing down on him. It was real, comfortable and comforting. He wasn't sure what to do, but he wanted to please her. He ran his hands over her body, pressing her closer, cautiously, he slipped his hands into her underwear, exploring a bit. As he pressed harder her breathing grew more and more ragged. His other hand traveled down her back unzipping her dress, tracing patterns on the exposed skin of her thighs before he pulled it off over her head. Underneath he discovered nothing but the lithe lines of her bare waist topped with the small, soft mounds of her breasts. He stopped, suddenly faltering, wondering if he was moving too fast, once again taking advantage of a vulnerable situation...

She stared back down at him from where she was perched, straddling his midriff. A smile spread slowly from the edge of her mouth. Her bright colored eyes no longer looked foggy in the half light. Delicate hands were suddenly sliding into his shirt, shoving him down by the shoulders, unbuttoning his pants. kissing his face, biting his arms, licking his stomach gradually moving downward until his dick was cradled in her mouth.

She began with enthusiasm, he relaxed, accepting the gesture, letting his hand rest on the back of her head as she sucked. The sensation flowed through his body in mind-bending waves, sharpening his need into a finer point. Making him want her even more.

When she finally paused, sitting up to meet, his eyes, the look in her eyes was soft, searching for approval, but when their eyes met she smiled, licking her lips as if she wanted to go back for more. He could no longer stand it.

"Get up here." he half-growled, gripping the side of her head, tugging at her hair in the right direction.

She shakily stood up on her hands and knees Dirk sat up to meet her, pulling her close, really running his hands through her hair, over the small of her back, partaking in the smell of her skin and satisfying feel of supple, taught flesh in his hands.

Tension began to rise as he nudged her into place, she complied readily, anticipation lengthening and intensifying her movements. He pressed just the tip of his penis inside her, just long enough for the thrill of first contact. She started to push back, trying to get him to go deeper, but he stopped her, his hand on her cheek, he made sure to look her in the eye, he hoped the intensity of his gaze could communicate how much this meant to him.

"Dirk..." she paused too, shakily resting her on palm on his, "I love you... I always will."

He faltered, for all all of his own plays at being devoted in one way or another, he couldn't say it. Not to anyone, those words that she spoke so freely.  
"I-" he tried to say something, maybe this time would be different, but a soft touch was covering his lips.

"You don't have to you know," she smiled, just a bit of sadness touching the edges of her mouth, "you don't have to say anything." She twined her arms around his neck, pressing her face into his, "this is enough for me..."

It wasn't fair, she was operating on the assumption that this was all about charity. That he got nothing out of this, when the reality was that he got so much more, to have the full attention of another human being was all that he had ever asked for, all that he had ever wanted. And, despite what everyone knew his preferences to be, he wanted her. The lines of her body, the sound of her voice made him stumble whenever they got too close, he was just good at hiding it.  
Maybe, if he could just show her...

He switched their positions, shoving her down into the mattress while he climbed on top, the swivel of his hips working its way in between her legs. He was tight, he nuzzled into her neck trying to get her to relax a bit. Warming her up with the movement of his lips, gently pressing his teeth into her skin, she yelped slightly, a tremor running down her back.

He took the plunge, the breathy sound of her excitement, making him glad he did, the warm, tightness of her insides making it pure adrenaline. Every pump made him want to make the next one harder, faster, but even in that state he forced himself to slow down. He made sure each stroke was well placed, that it when all the way in, that as he grew closer and closer to climax, so did she.

"Ah, Dirk-" the slippery sound of him going in and out had become audible underneath all other noises, the sound of her voice in his ear egged him on, "you're drivinging me crazy..."

"Obviously not enough," he said with a slight smirk, "if you can still talk like that." he bit down on her neck again, catching her off gaurd and illiciting a soft moan. He reached around, grabbing her butt, squeezing a bit before gently pressing his fingers in back there.

"Ah-youre-" she started to say a she realized what he was doing, but with just a few more tweaks of his fingertips she had turned to jelly in his arms, hervoice rising into breathy screams. Things were getting intense on his end as well, but he held on for a little longer, waited until he felt the last shudders of orgasm running through her body. Only then did he give into the feeling, letting himself overflow to bursting, pulling out at the final moment, making a sticky mess of the sheets and her thighs.

It felt like ages since he'd had any kind of release. His head was swimming as he looked down at her. Heaving chest, smeared mascara, the creamy residue dripping down her thighs, the still pasty, drunken tinge to her skin, she was a mess, but as she smiled up at him and for once everything felt... alright.

"Dirk- You're lookign at me funy..." (*looking *funny)

"Of course I am," He reached for hers as he rolled to his side, attenton never shifting from their conversation "this is all pretty friggin unprecedented..."  
She smiled wryly and snuggled into his side, "Should I bother asking if that's good or bad?"

"Why do you always gotta go there, I said it was unprecedented. That just means it's never happened before."

"I know what unpercidented means..." (*unprecedunted *under-whatevs)

"I'm sure you do..." he absently patted her on the brow, feeling warm and sleepy in a way that he hadn't for a while.

"So-" Roxy looked up at him, obviously fighting sleep herself, holding onto just one idea that she must have seen as unfinished. Wha do you thikn now?"("What *think)

"What do I think?"

"Do yuo want to not leave? (*you)

"I dunno" He said, looking down at her thoughtfully " I'm still kind of waiting for everything about this place to go downhill somehow." his voice lowered as he snuggled down to her level curling his arms around her small frame once again, burying his face in her collarbone, "But I sure as hell hope that I'll always have you with me."

No matter how things changed, to him, she would always be the last girl on Earth...

((K so I edited this from a really really terrible old fic I had... and I don't know if its worse or better now XD;;))


End file.
